Do not stand at my grave and weep I am not there. I do not sleep. I am a thousand winds that blow. I am the diamond glints on snow. I am the sunlight on ripened grain. I am the gentle autumn rain. When you awaken in the morning's hush I am the swift uplifting rush Of quiet birds in circled flight. I am the soft stars that shine at night. Do not stand at my grave and cry; I am not there. I did not die. I read that poem for my own selfish reasons..... On Tuesday 2nd October I went to go see my Dad for the last time. It took a long time to decide whether I actually wanted to go into the room or not. I still hadn’t cried in that uncontrollable way that I feel as a daughter I’m supposed to, so I did. It was hard and I did cry a little but seeing him didn’t bring the tears I was hoping for. He looked at peace, but the man in the room didn’t look or feel like the man I know and love as my dad. After leaving the room. I sat with my Nan and Granddad and this poem was on the table. It has stuck with me everyday ever since. This was a message from my dad saying its OK not to cry in that way. I know my dad hated to see his daughter cry, so this was his way of telling me not to because he is no longer here to help stop my tears. So to help me get through with the least amount of tears possible I will try and remember a few key facts. 1)My partner Ricky and I gave my dad a Grandson that made him so proud. Xyele will always have happy memories of his “Dad-Dad” who danced, played and acted a fool with him every time they got the chance. It’s my job to keep that happy memory alive. 2)My Mother and fathers relationship has taught me what it means to fight for happiness. Even when life throws challenges at you, never give up and the strongest relationships will come out the other side. 30 years of marriage is solid proof that it can be done. 3)Yes... My dad was taken from us at what may seem too soon. However he didn’t die in a hospital bed from a terminal illness or underneath a car. He died in Jamaica whilst on holiday with the love of his life and he was having the time of his life. When he died he was swimming in the sea, which is one of his favourite things to do. He was in no pain and he was happy. There are many people that would wish to die in that way, so I will not be selfish and wish for an extension of his life to take that away from him. I will always love you Dad and I know you will continue to watch over me.